Skip to main content

The deep joy of off-shore call centres

Vodafone seem to be losing the plot. A little.

Daughter had a total episode trying to pay her bill yesterday - she stopped direct debits due to Vodafone's mysteriously ever-changing bills causing havoc with her student part-time working income management. 

The charming girl in India, or wherever the corporate tax dodgers base their call centres, had great difficulty in venturing even slightly off-script.

VODAFONE: "What is your pin number?"
DAUGHTER: "It's double zero blah blah"
VODAFONE: "That''s not what we have here"
DAUGHTER: "Well it's the one I've had for the past 5 years"
VODAFONE: "Can you repeat it?"
DAUGHTER: "Yes it's zero zero blah blah"
VODAFONE: "That's not what you said first time"
DAUGHTER: "Yes, I did"
VODAFONE: "No, you said double zero blah blah"

You couldn't really make it up!

However, daughter, a bit outspoken at times, somewhat like her father, was asked prior to the ending of this very fraught conversation, the perfunctory  "Is there anything else I can help you with today?"

 She replied "Yes please. Could you move your call centre back to the UK, teach staff how to go off their script if they need to, and ask your bosses to pay their fair share of corporate tax please?" 

She did suffix her conversation with a "And sorry, I do know you are only doing your job as best as you can to carry out what your managers have told you to do".

 You can tell my daughter is off to study politics at University. Watch our Dave/Nick/Ed - she's gunning for your job!
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Season for all men

Well, we’re used to hearing about the Camping Season , which for Scouts runs from approximately 31st March to 31st October each year, although Graham Norton’s camping season lasts all year. Then there’s the Caravan Season , where Jeremy Clarkson spends six months with extremely high blood pressure as he tries to overtake them on the A38 in an excruciatingly expensive and completely unnecessary car. The Japanese have their Scientific Season, which was a series of sporadic weeks where they slaughtered endangered whales for scientific research, the results of which seem to be a closely guarded world-secret. This season now looks set, thanks to a group of spineless, land-locked countries threatened by the Land of the Rising Scientific Research with paying more for their Nintendos and PlayStations, to last until the final whale is wiped off the face of the oceans. I have written to the Japanese Embassy four times now seeking details of this research (email address info@l...
Post a Comment
Read more

"Q". My name is Bond. Oh. not THAT Q.

I was sent a story today by a friend who knows my feelings on the subject - that is, about one of the consummately greatest of all British activities, namely, queuing. It seems some Danish Professor or other has come up with the theory that those who queue the longest should actually be served the last. He claims it makes purchasing something altogether more efficient and smooth through the idea of 'contra-queuing' (whatever the devil that may mean). 'Serve the people at the back of the queue first', he says, with profound wisdom. Altogether very professorial, albeit demonstrating a somewhat keen lack of understanding of the purchasing psyche. The Nobel Prize-chasing Prof suggests that if, for example, a popular entertainment act was to announce a tour, with tickets going on sale at 11am one morning, using the theory of 'contra-queuing', no one will want to be first to buy said tickets. So no one will turn up 14 months in advance and venues will...
2 comments
Read more

Leeds Bradford Airport leads the way............

............................. for their rip-off Britain welcome to passengers. Leeds Bradford Airport (LBA) continues its policy of extracting as much money as it can from its visiting captive audience with a new £6 charge for vehicles with more than 7 seats. The 'spokesman', who by now must be scarlet with embarrassment having to continually justify LBA's various daylight robbery methods says about the charge "they now have a dedicated lane with the space they need to operate safely." You have to hand it to LBA. They continually come up with some classic and great excuses to justify their substantial range of hidden passenger taxes. There is a £2 "fee" for delivering or collecting passengers 400m in front of the airport terminal. Great start to a holiday, getting soaked traipsing 400m to the terminal door in the often inclement Yorkshire weather (free drop off and less than a 50m walk under cover to the doors of Manchester Airport Terminal 2). A...
2 comments
Read more