Thursday, 17 May 2012

Brand typecasting

I think I've discovered a new phenomenon about branding.


For example, most females - and I'm not being sexist here, just quantitative through observance - driving a Mini or one of those ridiculous and unnecessary 4x4 juggernauts, tend to be blond. And always on their mobiles. In fact, I'm convinced the new Rage Rover Evqoues that have sprung up around our area are all being driven in turn by the same short, blond, telephone-obsessed woman.

Similarly, the young ladies with their jeans tucked into their genuine, or otherwise, Ugg boots, look like clones of each other, identical hair, far too much make-up, copy fashion bags hanging from their arms and interminable Blackberry clutched in their hands. (As an aside, I cannot understand why they have to nurse their phone, checking it every seven seconds - it is so simple to get it to make a sound when there's a message. I know back in the 70's/80's I never wandered around the house with the phone and handset glued to me 24/7!).

Then there's the great unwashed. Always in blue tracksuits (with perfunctory white stripes down the legs) and trainers, despite there being no intention on their part to take any form of exercise whatsoever, the exception being the lifting of chips out of their newspaper wrapping or a slow amble down to the pub to exchange their weekly shopping money for beer.

And then there are the 'cool dudes', with their cumbersome ape-like, swinging, bandy-legged walk, with a baseball cap either sideways or backwards on their head, a ridiculous cheap large, fake diamond ear-stud in each ear, and trouser crotch at, or below, their knees. Listening, and making us listen, because they are too ignorant to use earphones, to what sounds like building site noise backing someone shouting unintelligible vocalised garbage from their mobile phones.

And all of these people were the first to complain that they had to wear a school uniform, yet they look and act more identical than ever!

Then there's a hard core of men at an age when they seem to have forgotten they were teenagers over 50 years ago, but they insist on having ignorant football club tattoos and a, or several, gold curtain ring/s in one ear, appearing, to all intents and purposes, like complete numbskulls. Unless the earrings are to tether them to the kitchen sink for some washing up duties at home.

I think it has a lot to do with the fact that the chasm between fashion and style has widened to such an extent.

I saw a picture of the designer Karl Lagerfeld a short time back following his presentation of the Chanel collection. And what a mess he looked. Almost 70, ponytail, Harry Hill-style shirt with tie untidily and not fully done up, pair of jeans with cowboy boots and some sort of grey, tailed trench coat.

Even to those of us who are completely fashion unconscious, he looked a total mess. And the fact he's "Karl Lagerfeld" is no excuse.

Fashionable perhaps. Stylish, not even remotely.

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