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"What do you feel you can bring to the business?"

 With potential change-of-job time of year on the horizon, here are some answers to the age-old standard question every good (🤣🤣🤮) HR person asks at an interview. "What do you feel you can bring to the business?"
1. On a Friday, a 12-portion Black Forest Gateaux
2. Class A drugs that we can split the proceed from on a 50/50 basis
3. A very loud klaxon (Nigel Farage - he's the MP for Klaxon isn't he?) that is triggered every time someone says "basically", "obviously", "literally", "reach out", uses "super" as either an adverb or adjective or tells a customer "We take such issues very seriously"
4. A proper personnel manager who will do what you currently do far more efficiently and effectively, but on half the salary
5. Will run sessions to teach staff how to pronounce the "h" at the beginning of a word that begins with "h", the "g" at the end of a gerund and any "t" occurring in the middle of a word
6. Show staff how to avoid "replying to all" when an email comes from accounts or HR
7. Instruct staff on basic toilet hygiene, such as flushing the toilet after use, putting the seat lid down and teaching men who have the habit of mopping or combing back their hair with their hands that they really need to wash them first, especially if the toilet tissue is only budget two-ply.

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