Skip to main content

Smart phones, stupid people

Fair dues to my insurance provider for their call centre being open and answering the phone within three minutes. Although I do feel the workers deserve their bank holiday and I could have waited until tomorrow.
 
BUT. 
 
Although over the phone, I don't believe the charming gent on the other end of the phone was aware he was waving a red flag at this grumpy old bull.
 
"Thank you for reaching out" - no Romesh, I phoned and you very kindly answered. My arms have been almost in the same position by my side during most of my endeavours to contact your company.
 
"I can feel your pain" - really Romesh? Have you had a bout of gout recently then too? No, nothing painful to feel really, I'm afraid dear chap; I was just not able to log into my account to renew my policy. Frustrating but not especially painful.
 
"My core competencies don't extend to PC problems I'm afraid" - no need to be afraid Romesh. Perhaps try one of your peripheral or even out-of-body competencies instead.
 
"I'm buying into your problem" - really, out of your own pocket? Aw shucks Romesh, that's very kind of you, but there's really no need to. Oh, hang on, maybe you'd care to pay off my credit card in full instead then!
 
I'm only glad he was, yes, well anticipated by you, "super happy" to have been able to help me today.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Airport amusement

There is no doubt that airports can be quite amusing places. That is apart from being told by a burly security supervisor at the x-ray gate that thanks to the only contribution Yasser Arafat ever made to society, I had to remove my belt, shoes, watch and place my AK-47 in the tray provided. Watching people going around their travel ‘business’ in airports and on board the aircraft is hilarious. There are those who are plainly not very good at it, continually checking all manner of minutiae with the other members of the party. “Do we go to the gate?”, “Have we time for a beer?”, “I MUST get a pizza”. There are those who have plainly not done it much before and like their fellow travellers to be made fully aware of the exact opposite, as they point and gesture to the monitor shouting out their destination and boarding gate at every passing opportunity to one and all around them. There are those who think they are something special – despite the fact they are travelling via bu...
Post a Comment
Read more

Are Camelot dim, dysfunctional, liars or just plain greedy?

There can be no denying that UK lottery operators Camelot are on to a good thing. Especially the overpaid management. They have been reaping the benefits of the franchise for years now - a franchise that in essence, has been licenced by the government to print money. However, I can't quite make up my mind whether the management of the Lotto are dim, dysfunctional, liars or just plain greedy, although the cynic in me answers the question when I consider the chief Executive of Camelot was complaining last year that the annual bonus on her not inconsiderable 7-figure salary had been reduced (conveniently forgetting her 18 year sojourn to date at Camelot has produced a pension we mere mortals can only dream about. How about the poor soldiers, CEO Dianne Thompson, who come back from the far-east minus a leg and have to legally fight for compensation that doesn't even touch what you earn less than a month? And they don't receive CBE's for their troubles either !). Irres...
Post a Comment
Read more

Why your kids never reply to your mobile communications

A frequent topic of conversation among my own peer group of retired and semi-retired wrinklies is regarding Millennials (born 1981 to 2000) and early Generation Z (2001 to 2020) and their ability to be glued to their mobiles 24/7, yet never replying in a timely manner to a communication from their older kith and kin. They don't reply, yet will gladly get it touch immediately with their own peers to ask, "Do you follow Chardonnay Moron on 'Insta' - she's soooo cool". Yes, cool, but otherwise clueless, and usually an inept, Beluga-lipped, tattooed moron who prefers to spout total crap on 'soshul meeja' on topics they in reality know absolutely nothing, using this as a job, instead of actually working gainfully for a living. " Like, follow and share " are the only three words these wastes of space know. Yet they are the new Messiahs of the Millennials and Gen Z, and woe betide any Millennials or Gen Z who might miss one single word - spelt wron...
Post a Comment
Read more