The Grumpy Old Blog

* When there were only three television stations (5 if you lived in Dublin where you nicked HTV and Ulster) * When the the TV remote control consisted of your feet and fingers * When bored children were taken to the park with a football instead of to McDonalds * When girls didn't have tattoos * When young mothers talked to their perambulated children rather than to Facebook and Snapchat * When you didn't need £15,000 of dental work, Ugg boots and a 4x4 you were unable to park in a traditional parking space in order to be a "real" housewife * When your parents wouldn't have let you out of the house with your hat on backwards, the knees of your trousers cut away, your underpants' band showing and your trouser crotch down at your knees * When Manchester United and Manchester City footballers all came from Manchester * You didn't take your phone with you to the toilet, to make a cuppa, to answer the door, to open the window, to go to bed, to...

Remembering back to a report in the Sunday Times not too long ago where is was stated that the respective Chinatowns of Liverpool (the oldest in the UK), Manchester and Newcastle are in serious decline, diner numbers having reduced dramatically with some restaurants sadly having to close. The situation has not been remedied either by the arrival of the pandemic. The main reasons they cite for the closures are: the emergence of world foods bringing a much bigger choice for the consumer lack of suitable chefs to run the kitchens competition from new retail schemes, restaurants and 'street food' collectives in more salubrious and accessible parts of the cities I am the first to concede this may indeed be the case. Yes, new retail and dining experience schemes do indeed take away from the traditional Chinatown areas that have now not only become somewhat tired in comparison, but have increasingly - in fairness, through no fault of their own - been left in areas that are now seen ...

Well done to everyone involved with Sport Relief in raising almost £40milion and especially to the fantastic Zoe Ball for raising a thoroughly amazing £1million-plus on her own. Bet dad Johnny must be so proud. Astounding. P.S. Also, delighted to see that 3 of the 11 homeless people sleeping in doorways along Manchester's Deansgate this morning now have little put-me-up-tents. Not that I'm advocating too much charity should begin at home. But at least three of these unfortunate people can now cough and sneeze in the comfort of their own now-enclosed pavement slabs. Oh! And that after 8 months of chaos they have now resurfaced Bury New Bottleneck Road as part of the £800,000 "Village" improvement that no one in the area wanted nor were consulted on. I'm just chuffed, as a council tax payer, that the cash-strapped Council indeed had some spare cash to waste, er, sorry, I mean spend on this. Well done to Councillor Backhandcash for pushing it...

Councils are very hard to understand. I heard on the radio this morning that 7 million actions have been taken this year by council bin-snoop police throughout the country, many resulting in income for said councils in the form of fines. One lady in the midlands was fined £50 for throwing a jam jar into her full paper-cardboard recycle bin. They should be glad she recycles anything, given the shameful way the residents of our apartment block carry on!  Yes, councils continually cry poverty, yet pay very senior staff  a fortune (not the humble coal-face workers dealing with an often very-miffed public; I mean they pay a fortune to the ones with strings of meaningless letters after their name and who use just an initial and surname so you don't know whether they are a Mr, Mrs, Miss or a combination of all three. I mean, if you get a letter from "A Jobsworth" would you know whether they are a Mr, Mrs, Miss or a combination of all three?).  They come up with wonderful ideas...

Well Happy New Year to one and all. Here are few predictions to keep you all on your toes: * The government will trigger Article 60 rather than Article 50 and the UK will head towards a very successful Breakfast, making cereal, tea and toast compulsory for all * A call-centre telephone welcome message will announce "calls may be recorded in case you the customer or we the supplier cock it all up" * And the Secretary of State for Business Innovation and Skills will explain exactly what the "training purposes" are that altogether piss-poor call centres record telephone conversations for * Jeremy Corbyn will be elected Leader Hosen for Islington North and will make, as expected, a mess of flower-bed watering during the inevitable drought to be announced in July * Diane Abbott will agree to go on a John McDonnell-sponsored 'diet', but losing out in translation, will only realise, after spending £70 on Dylon, that it wasn't a 'dye it' he w...

A few years ago, some unbelievable, half-witted numbskull invented the altogether irritatingly meaningless term 'pre-loved'. As a term, it is so frighteningly and shamefully stupid that whoever invented it really needs to be either forced to re-sit a national English examination, or made to sit in a dark room and listen to a Little Mix interview played over and over again. A couple of years ago, the financial news correspondents on television and in newspapers were cock-a-hoop about the economy and banking institutions having, needing or wanting a 'haircut'. More meaningless nonsense. Unless there was an inference that the overpaid clots in finance who brought the UK to its knees in 2008 with their abject greed were barbers. Which is not really very fair to the purveyors of scissors and combs who attempt to keep the nation's hair in order. As 2016 comes to a close, those in the media and the people they interview have been busy-busy making 'binary' decis...

I had a flashback to some 25 years ago when I worked in Guiseley, a small town just south of Otley (famous for Thomas Chippendale) in the Leeds Metropolitan Borough. It is famed for being the origin and headquarters of the world-famous Harry Ramsden's fish and chips, at one time "the world's biggest fish and chip restaurant" and connected to the parents of Harry "Sooty, Sweep and Sue" Corbett (as well as Silver Cross Prams, Shires Bathrooms, Greenwood's Menswear, Compton Lighting and Wendy Wools). On one occasion I was in the then recently built, and at the time, flagship Morrison's Supermarket, a flagship to the extent that Sir Ken Morrison regularly turned up to service behind the deli counter. On that day, I was in the cash-out queue behind a young mother with her twin children in a double buggy (yes, it was a fine, locally-made, Silver Cross double-buggy!). Now bearing in mind this was before the digital revolution that now sees most young moth...