The Grumpy Old Blog

    Brilliant! February may not quite be finished, but spring MUST be on the way, as the first leaflets 'spring' through the door for the 4th May local elections. Almost 10 weeks to go, and some Labour oik who I have never heard of or ever seen before is having a go at gaining my vote. I have every faith that the respective Conservative and LibDem oiks as well the one of five-a-day, thoroughly detestable Greens will be shoving their recyclables through my letterbox soon too. I don't know why, but my paper recycling bin is to the left of my front door. Just cut out the middle man - me - and put your electioneering rubbish straight in the bin. Unlike some friends of mine who have become councillors, with their hard work benefiting the residents of places such as Swinton, Crumpsall and Prestwich, I am not interested in some oik whom I have never seen before, with his ridiculous footballer haircut and man bun, and a stupid curtain-ring earring in both ears, representing me. I ...

(A very ironic question above. . . . WTF indeed! Does even its inventor know?) Can I interest you in a motor insurance policy, there's reasonable monthy repayments . . . . . but do note that it won't pay out if you have a motor accident or if someone steals your car? Well how about buying my restaurant? It seats 70 people, has an ultra-modern catering kitchen and a fully-stocked bar . . . . . . . although, sorry, you can't serve food and drink in it, and you will have to close by 6.00pm each evening before dinner. Or maybe you’d prefer to go to DFS and pay the full retail price for a sofa? Ok. Perhaps not. Well in that case, why not try "secular koranism"? It's wonderful in the same way as you get to have a deserved rest in bed when you contract malaria. This is, admittedly a long blog. It is based purely on what I have read and replied (sometimes at length, but it seems to be water off an especially waterproof duck's back) to the inventor of this incredib...