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You have to hand it to Apple

There can be no doubt that Apple make some really superb bits of (very expensive) kit. World class, aspirational and quite desirable stuff.

However, they are becoming a bit twee in their old age. Remarkable with it, but nevertheless very twee.

Their chopped-off (er, cordless) ear phones for one. Who would have thought that any company could design an in-demand product that makes the user look like they are on day release from a corrective institution? They have succeeded in turning "dolt-looking" into such an iconoclastic look that there are companies actually producing copy fashion accessory versions for £12 a pair. These purposefully don't contain any technology and don't actually perform any function apart from looking like ridiculous Apple iPhone ear buds.

Who would have thought it was possible that people would actually pay £12 to wear something that is not only stupid-looking, but has actually been designed NOT to work?

And the new iPhone 11 Pro. Does this infer that up to now we have all been using amateur phones? So is there now a pro vs amateur way of phoning, texting or glueing to social mediocrity that we have been unaware of thus far?

And what's this business with three lenses on the phone (yes, remember it's a phone not a camera)? Is it really necessary? The advertising is all around the three lenses on the camera. They might as well go into the camera business and sell it as a camera that you can make phone calls with, send texts from and access the internet to follow those vital 83% of social influencers who have been outed as not only clueless about the subjects they witter on about, but are simply being sponsored to lie .

For a phone costing £1,000, you can otherwise get a mighty fine SLR camera with a superb real multi glass lens for half that price and then spend less than the remainder on a phone that does most of the stuff you'd expect a modern day phone to do anyway!

Come on world. Wake up and smell an ordinary £250 smartphone.

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