Skip to main content

Eyes wide shut. Brexit or Brexin?


Well. 52% of the population were happy to be sold a car they didn't need by salesmen who knew nothing about it (Farage and Bozza), and despite the fact the 52% were told and accepted it was the ideal family car, they have since found out nearly three years down the line that not only does it do only 13 mpg, but it can accommodate only the driver and one passenger, has no boot space, spare tyres cost £600 each, it needs an oil change every 500 miles and servicing every 2,000 miles by the one specialist service shop in the UK 230 miles from their home. 

And on top of that, businesses having nothing to do with the car, in fact not even in the automotive sector, are going to make a fortune out of it because so many of the parts that have absolutely nothing to do with the car, but will be used as an excuse to make money, will be "in short supply", "stuck in customs" or attract the soon to be introduced BAT (Brexit Added Tax).

Meanwhile Infiniti, the luxury side of Nissan have decided to pack their bags in Sunderland and head back to the Land of the Rising Sun. Needless to say they cite the usual blah-blah-depressed-car-sales nonsense.

And top of the stack for hypocrisy are bean counting consultants, Ernst and Young, one of the big-4 parasites and paid a seven-figure fortune to promote the Best of British and Building Future Britain campaigns. Well they're putting their money where their feet are and shifting their legal operation from London to Brussels as the company braces for Brexit.

A fine example of Brexit support - no doubt they will be contributing to the £650million a week the NHS are NOT going to receive as a result of Brexit, unless that £650million is coming out of the pockets of Farage and Boris, for which I humbly apologise to the two blokes if it is. With a chip in from another chief Brexiteer, Sir Dyson Bagless, Earl of Singapore Manufacturers.

So go on. Let's leave NOW, if only to be able to tell the Brexiteers and that smug Farage (with his huge EU pension - bet he won't be splitting that with any of the country's homeless any time soon) that we've gone and done it without their help. I'm just wondering if our "Nige" will manage to find a reason, other than £73,000 a year plus expenses and pension, to stay on as an MEP after we leave the EU - I wouldn't put it past him.

Neither presumably will Boris be sharing his £250,000 a year from The Telegraph for his weekly column) 5 years down the line - "We told you so". We have EFTA (the European Free Trade Association invented by the UK back in 1959 - do philatelists remember those useless 5th Anniversary stamps issued in commemoration in, I think it was, 1965!) to fall back on.

We can re-join Norway and Switzerland who seem to manage quite nicely, and while not party to the EU Customs Union, it includes Schengen membership.

As for the NI situation. . . . . . let's all head over to the Titanic Museum and have a huge p*ss up!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The "Win a Million" free scratch card newspaper inserts

One of those three-panel "Win a Million" scratchcards fell out of my newspaper this morning. Not a major or in anyway newsworthy event in itself, but I must admit my surprise. I didn't think anyone bothered with them anymore, or, to be a little more technical, I didn't think anyone was taken in by them anymore. Firstly, it actually is printed on the bottom of each panel that "Every card has a set of 3 matching symbols, 2 matching symbols and no matching symbols". Right, so you are going to 'win', half-win and not win respectively. Then, while the prize list is somewhat impressive with 1x£1m, 1x£100k, 2x£20k, 3x£10k and other things like holidays, tablet PC's city breaks all the way down to 1000 "faux" fashion watches, 1000 salon  makeovers and 1000xVIP Thames cruises. Now should I be stupid enough to spend the £1.53 a minute for the 6 minute phone call to claim my prize (that's almost a tenner, for those of you without cal

"Q". My name is Bond. Oh. not THAT Q.

I was sent a story today by a friend who knows my feelings on the subject - that is, about one of the consummately greatest of all British activities, namely, queuing. It seems some Danish Professor or other has come up with the theory that those who queue the longest should actually be served the last. He claims it makes purchasing something altogether more efficient and smooth through the idea of 'contra-queuing' (whatever the devil that may mean). 'Serve the people at the back of the queue first', he says, with profound wisdom. Altogether very professorial, albeit demonstrating a somewhat keen lack of understanding of the purchasing psyche. The Nobel Prize-chasing Prof suggests that if, for example, a popular entertainment act was to announce a tour, with tickets going on sale at 11am one morning, using the theory of 'contra-queuing', no one will want to be first to buy said tickets. So no one will turn up 14 months in advance and venues will

How to use supermarket self-service check-outs

Check the queue at the main till, and weigh this up against the number of items you have in your hand (a litre of milk, a chocolate bar, a toothbrush and a small bag of salad). Make the decision that scanning these four items at the self-service check-out can't possibly take longer than waiting in the assistant-serviced queue, especially as the current customer, a fur coat-clad woman, is arguing about the supermarket running out of GM, gluten-free, diet, sugar-free, fat-less lettuce and having to pack her own bag. This despite the fact that the assistant, who, although half your age, is certainly worth you standing there and being mentally undressed by you as you wait. But you sensibly opt for speed over a very attractive young woman. Press “Begin”, and scan in your loyalty card so the machine can spit out some extremely “relevant” offers when you have completed your purchase, thus proving that the supermarket knows everything about you - your buying habits, your shirt size, whe